I had just returned to Toronto from the Business of Software Conference 2007, the date was October 31st and the time was 6AM. I took a cab straight to the office, this after a flight from San Francisco. I could have skipped the day, but I wanted to make a showing at the company halloween contest. Upon my arrival at the office I decided I’d dress up as one of my favourite television characters, Gregory House.

There are prerequisites one must meet before they can be House. Some I embody naturally, for others I’d need a bit more work.

Mad problem solving skills. Check.
Stubble. Check.
Attitude. Check.
Quick wit. Check.
Ability to hurl insults. Check.
Jacket on jeans, unbuttoned shirt not tucked in with running shoes. Check.

Cane. Missing.
Vicodin. Missing.

I went over to the closest Shopper’s Drug Mart. They had a small selection of canes and I picked the one that I felt was most House-like. I didn’t have enough time to soup up the cane. But I did walk with a House style limp.

Cane. Check.

A co-worker always stocked Tylenol at work, I asked him whether he had any empty containers. He did. I bought tic tacs and put them in the container.

Vicodin. Check.

Each participant in the contest was called up so that they could display their costumes. When I went up I said things that I thought House would say. I may have said slightly unpleasant things about co-workers, VPs and the CEO. I was later told that I was milder than I had been at some other meetings.

After everyone had displayed their costumes, everyone was asked to cheer the loudest for who they thought ought to be the winner. I think I came in 3rd or 2nd.

The person who came in 1st was dressed up as … wait for it … me.

That’s right. I lost to a person who dressed up as me. So in a way, I won. In the morning this guy made a joke that he should participate as me. I liked the idea so I gave him my hat and a deck of cards. He got the most cheers.

This is a true story. It happened to me (and someone dressed up as me).

(See, even if I lose, I win)

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