there will be a moment
when I will have lost
every fibre of my being
all my memories gone
all the names
all the faces
all the journeys
all the places
my every moment gone
and in that moment
I will miss you
kuch nahin par kuch to hai
there will be a moment
when I will have lost
every fibre of my being
all my memories gone
all the names
all the faces
all the journeys
all the places
my every moment gone
and in that moment
I will miss you
why give context
to silence?
what a waste
of silence.
it is important
that no one
is watching
it is then
that I will be me
it is then
that you will know
who i am
(and even then?)
it is not a moment of silence we share
it is emptiness
as we both die inside a little
creating a vacuum
that brings us closer
cameray se sherma ke jao ge kahan?
palak japhakte hi tasweer banjaye gi
chehre ko chupane ka kya faida?
tasweer mein haathoon ki lakheerein hoongi
do we incur a debt
for the smiles we cause?
I don’t want this debt.
This is a debt I cannot repay.
these words, they hit and run,
words that hit, and don’t sit
to see what happens next,
words that run, and miss out on the fun
and fear of judgement.
words that have no meaning,
so you make your own.
words that carry no feelings,
so you make your own.
words that don’t tell you who I am,
so you make your own
me
this is not poetry
it is thought in words
words lined up
my lines
crap, forgot
that snap thought
in so small a moment
it got lost
in this moment,
I am not zen.
I can see the world,
and the world can see me.
I am not zen,
I am dead inside.
not a little,
but a lot.
I am dead to this box,
and this box dead to me.
there is no flow,
the movement is not symphony
as I pry my fingers against these keys.
even though the box complies,
I am not satisfied.
I am not happy.
I am at a loss, so no,
in this moment,
I am not zen.